Week 7 - Halfway through 90 days

We had midterms this week. Our trainers finally reviewed how much weight and inches we have lost. Or as they prefer to say, how much fat we have released. My totals were 15 pounds and 14.5 inches lost. Not bad. That puts me within range of my goal of getting under 180, and actually close to my marathon weight of 170. The good news is that people are noticing the weight loss and my running is getting easier. Bad news is that most of my pants don't fit, which means either alterations or more clothing purchases. I picked up the three suits I bought in New Orleans from the tailor this week. I wore the black suit this weekend (more on that later). Parky told me I looked like a movie star. I would say he was being ironic except that he doesn't do irony. He does do BS, which is probably more to the point.

Our homework has included a 7 CD audio set entitled "Loving What Is" by Byron Katie. The book centers around 4 simple questions Katie discovered while recovering from stress and depression in a halfway house in 1986. Since that time she has done what she calls "the Work" with hundreds of people, walking them through the four questions in an effort to free them from stress and woe. I've listened to six of the seven CDs. You would think I'd have the questions memorized but I'm not entirely sure that I do. Here's what I remember.

As to a stressful or distressing thought, such as "my spouse should listen to me," as the following questions:

1. Is this true?

2. Do I absolutely know that this is true?

3. Where would I be without this thought?

4. Is there a non-stressful way to think about this thought?

After going through the questions, she recommends turning the thought around. In this case, the turnaround would be, "I should listen to my spouse."

Her effort is to get people to accept reality, and a lot of this involves eliminating the "shoulds" from our thinking, at least as applied to the behavior of others. In so doing, we learn to accept and love reality, or, as she says, to unconditionally love people, meaning to love them as they are, not as we wish they might be.

Over the years, these questions might have helped me with a number of important relationships and issues. As for the future, you just never know, but I think the questions could make a difference.

Tuesday I traveled to Cedar City to meet Parky and talk with him to the Southern Utah University administration regarding a deal for use in Africa of a house design developed by Matt Edwards of the university's construction management department. We came to a basic understanding, although I've worked through too many deals to believe a deal is done until it has been written up.

The university president, Mike Benson, and his provost, Brad Cook, are extraordinary. Both have Oxford PhDs, have amazing academic accomplishments, and more importantly are warm, engaging people who have the rare combination of vision and ability to get things done. They have launched a number of major programs, including their International Outreach program. They see the housing project as a way to potentially give their students international experience, attract international students, and begin to create a stream of royalty income. Because of his extensive political connections, particularly in Africa, they have given Parky the official title of University Ambassador, in which capacity he arranged for the president of Senegal to visit the university last weekend. Not bad for a small college in Southern Utah.