Weekend 3

After my visit to Dr. Christensen Friday morning I launched into what turned out to be an insanely busy weekend. Not as much rest as I had hoped but an interesting 2+ days.

At the invitation of Jim Parkinson, Friday evening Tauni and I had dinner at Ruth's Chris in Salt Lakewith a very distinguished group, including Parky and wife Sue, the Ambassador from Senegal to the US, Senator Orrin and Elaine Hatch, Waterford Institute Founder Dusty Hueston and his wife, Chair of the Missisippi Chapter of the NAACP Derrick Johnson and wife Leticia, Parky's son Brett and wife, Calfornia Court of Appeals Justice Doug Miller, and Jim's brother Tommy aka Dr. Brett Parkinson.

In his inimitable way, Parky directed us all where to sit. Thankfully, Tauni and I sat at the end of the table with Parky and Sue, Doug and Tommy. Tauni actually sat next to the Ambassador, who looked like she had been to at least one too many dinners and flown on too many airplanes during the past few days. Parky placed her directly across the table from the Hatches.

Tommy showed up after we were all seated. My first reaction was, "Who's the gay guy?" He could hardly look less like Parky, several inches shorter, dozens of pounds lighter (i.e, very fit vs. well padded), and a few notches more manic. It was like a TV sitcom character dropped in, a cross between Frazier and Niles. Once he had his bearings, he quickly monopolized the conversation, leaving even Parky relatively speechless. With gusto he covered topics ranging from gay marriage to exercise.

As pertains to the 90-Day program, the notable thing about the dinner was the task of finding something to fit within our nutrition parameters. I selected the wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli, sweet potato and tomato salad - all, I thought, reasonable choices. As Tauni pointed out, however, the sweet potato was more of a desert than a vegetable, liberally sprinkled with brown sugar and blended with butter or something else high in fat. I managed only small taste, however, so no harm.

On the subject of exercise, Tommy expounded at length about how we are not 21 anymore. He gave up running at age 40 and now does weight lifting and elliptical training on alternate days. He cautioned me about overdoing it, and then proceeded to order the banana cream desert. It turned out to be massive, literally about 8 inches in diameter. It was glazed with glazed with some sort of sugar topping and conservatively had to be at least 1200 calories, maybe as much as 1500 calories. I didn't even dare hazard a taste.

For the record, Tommy is not gay. He has a wife and four kids, about whom he provided a lot of information. Tommy is a radiologist, and specializes in mammography. Parky says he is brilliant (no doubt), and probably is the best in the world at his specialty. Throughout dinner as medical topics came up Tommy repeatedly declined to comment, explaining that the subject was outside his area of expertise. After dinner Tauni told me she loved Tommy and wants to have him give her a mammogram. (Jim arranged for him to give a mammogram to the Ambassador on Friday morning.) He clearly has a way with women

After desert Tommy drifted off and cornered Senator Hatch, who could be seen nodding solemnly while Tommy talked animatedly.

Before dinner there was a shooting at the Grand America Hotel, where the Ambassador and the Johnsons stayed. Leticia told me she saw a body lying on the ground from her window. Turns out is was a deranged Iraq vet, who was armed to the teeth, apparently intending to bag a police officer. Nice introduction to Salt Lake City.

After dinner Friday we drove the Derrick and Leticia to our cabin in Liberty. It was 10pm or thereabouts when we arrived and we were all tired so went right to bed. Tauni made Amish outmeal for breakfast. We had promised the Johnsons a hike with a view so took off after breakfast on the trail to the North Ogden Divide. Leticia was struggling with the altitude and stopping every few hundred feet it seemed. We ran into some hikers coming down the trail who said there were some folks on skittish horses further up the trail. A few minutes later a riderless horse, complete with saddle and bridle, came running down the trail toward us. Leticia had asked for a complete rundown on dangerous animals on our drive to the cabin the night before. We hadn't thought about runaway horses. She was prepared for cougars but a runaway horse clearly startled her. Fortunately, the horse stopped just before he reached Tauni and me. We approached him carefully. Tauni grabbed his reins and then ordered me to run up the trail to find his rider.

I took off, and to my pleasant surprise found my knee sound and the running easy. I hadn't gone more than about a quarter mile before I saw two women on horses coming my way, with a man walking in from of them. Turned out the runaway horse was his and was indeed skittish. He told us he got off to calm the horse down and it promptly ran off. He was relieved that to hear that we had found his horse and had him under control. That definitely goes down as my first capture of a spooked, riderless horse. From the 90-Day perspective, it was nice to find that running felt OK, even though I didn't go very far.

Following the hike we drove up to Snow Basin for lunch, where a mountain bike race was underway. After that I dropped off Tauni at home and Derrick and Leticia at the airport, and drove to Provo for a meeting with the Ambassador and the Rhino boys, who we have been negotiating with seemingly forever on the manufacture of houses for Tanzania. After the Ambassador left they told me they had a great plan for a house with steep pitched roof that they think would be perfect for the US market. They assured me they would still build houses in Tanzania but don't want to. I asked why and their answer reminded me of my namesake Harold Hill, "Wherever the people are as green as the money." Nothing like a vote of confidence. Imagine relying on a contractor 12,000 miles from home who doesn't want to be there but is willing to cash your check.

From the Rhino meeting I drove back to Sandy for dinner with Mari and the mother of her increasingly serious boyfriend at Mimi's. In contract to the Rhino boys, the mama definitely wanted to be there and was effusive about how much she loves Mari. We all (Tauni, Nina and I) thought she was great, a wonderful in-law if the relationship progresses that far.

I weighed in (sorry Erin) at 193 on Saturday, the lowest yet, and 18 pounds down from my all-time-fat high (ATFH) just before the Wasatch Back. I think that represents a loss of approximately 10 pounds in the three weeks since the 90-day program began. More significantly, I am finding that most of my pants have considerable slack around the waist, which measured 2 inches less than it did three weeks ago. Not bad, but the eating out is making the nutrition plan more difficult to follow.

After teaching Sunday School the next morning we drove again to Provo, this time for my nephew's non-farewell missionary farewell. The highlights included my brother-in-law singing "How Beautiful Upon the Mountains" at double fortissimo and a lunch layout that included the biggest brownie spread I have ever seen. I did great for about two hours but eventually the chicken salad became a temptation I could not resist. After 4 or 5 crackers covered with said salad we finally escaped for Spanish Fork with grandson Max to celebrate grandson Griffin's 4th birthday. More chicken here, but I at least avoided the birthday cake and ice cream.

We finally made it home about 9:30, wheere I collapsed into bed. The weekend included three restaurant meals, a large buffet and a birthday party. Thankfully I avoided desserts and most of the starchy items. I also managed to avoid further back strain and felt decent this morning. The knee is great but the back, following Tommy's admonition, is going to need continued tender loving care.

Week 3

I just finished the third week of workouts this morning. The first thing I did after working out (following a short visit to the Ragnar offices) was stop by Dr. Christensen's office for an adjustment. He determined, as I suspected, that a lumbar disk had again become misaligned and that my lower back is strained. After pummeling me for a few minutes he pronounced my spine in order, gave me instructions on a few stretching exercises, and prescribed a couple days of rest to give my back a chance to heal.

Of all things, I certainly did not imagine that my lower back would be a problem. It never has been before, but then I have never done so many lunges and squats before either. Dr. Christensen assures me it will heal, and the good news, I think, is that there appears to be no sign of disk injury.

It is hard to measure results incrementally, but a few thoughts emerge from the past week. First, I still get a lift from working out and getting up early. Nothing like starting the day happy.

Second, we are not supposed to get on the scales, but of course I do. The reason for the recommendation is evident. Day to day weight fluctuates considerably. Since I started, there have been two days where there suddenly is a four pound drop. Other days weight bounces around. This morning I was actually up about 2 pounds from yesterday. But the good news is I was able to comfortably fit into pants this morning that I could not get into two weeks ago.

Third, I am getting to know members of our group better, and enjoying them a lot. As with relay participation, there is nothing quite like pushing to physical limits together to bond people.

Fourth, is is pretty obvious which muscles are relatively strong and which are not. A partial inventory:

Shoulders - weak

Lats - strong

Upper abs - not bad

Lower abs - didn't know I had any; not so strong

Quads - strong

Hams - strong

Gluts - incredibly strong

Calves - good enough

Ankles and feet - week

That all said, I have to keep reminding myself to repeat as I get near exhaustion of some muscles: "I am strong." Doing an ab exercise yesterday, I caught myself saying out loud, "My abs are weak." Once I made the catch, I started to repeat in my mind, "I am strong," as I struggled through a few more reps. It did make a difference, demonstrating the importance of a cheering section, even if is is only in you mind. This is a time when schitzophrenia could be helpful; a cheerful imaginary friend might provide quite a lift. Short of that, affirmations and encouragement from trainers definitely helps get through the last difficult reps.

Our trainer Kristin runs the Top of Utah half marathon tomorrow. She looks fit and fast to me, so I am expecting she will post a very good time. When I mentioned the race to her this morning, she told me her mother at age 59 qualified for the Boston Marathon with a qualifying time of 4:06. I would be very happy with that performance.

I am looking forward to some recovery time this weekend and to feeling much stronger next week.

Week 2

The day I began the program I was greeted with the news that my dad, who recently broke his right arm just below the shoulder, fell and broke his hip. This was definitely very bad news, and I think the whole family thought this could well be the end of the road for him. I wasn't able to visit him till late in the week and that visit only confirmed my early impression that the outcome looked bad. He was disoriented and struggled to focus his mind. The effort appeared so intense that it almost made me weep. With his accountant brain the one thing he tried to manage was his intake of medication, and while I was there he seemed quite agitated that his cardiologist (who, by the way, is a wonderful doctor and human being) wasn't certain of what he had prescribed.

Beyond his considerable efforts to keep track of the pills he had swallowed, the only other subject Dad raised was whether Jake Heaps would start at QB for BYU. This, mind you, when Dad was of the frame of mind that his time was very short, like maybe a few days. Focused on survival, his only distraction was thoughts of the direction of a college football team.

On Sunday afternoon, about 9 days after my first visit, Tauni and I showed up in the Rehab Unit to visit Dad and see with our own eyes how he was doing. The transformation seemed nothing short of a miracle. He was dressed, seated in a wheelchair, seemingly without pain, and smiling. Still not up for a lot of conversation, but totally alert and, with his relentless focus, daily measuring his progress and making plans to return home.

Not to overlook my sisters, but my brothers are both saints. Doctor brother Tracy, who has an extraordinarily demanding and stressful job tending ICU patients, has been on call for family afflictions seemingly forever. And he has heroically managed Dad's admissions for his multiple fractures and assorted surgeries. He has been willing to call in prescriptions day or night and has consulted with us all endlessly.

Though Dad's improvement has been remarkable, it was evident by the end of his first week of rehab that upon discharge he would be nowhere near normal strength and that he and Mom could not manage without live in care. Another fall would be a disaster. On my first visit, when I asked what I could do to help, Dad asked that I pray that he never fall again.

So into this situation comes Ron, who happened to be visiting from his home in Vancouver, WA, with wife Karen at the time of Dad's fall. Because of Dad's frail condition Ron and Karen stuck around for over a week longer than planned. On Friday evening, about 11 days after Dad's fall, Ron told me went to bed with a prayer that he could find a solution for Dad's care needs. He woke the next morning with his answer. He would do it. He asked Karen if she agreed. She did.

Later that day Ron told Tracy, Mom and Dad of his decision. They all burst into tears, overjoyed. Ron and Karen plan to move into Mom's and Dad's basement around the first of October and remain up to a year, though they hope to be able to return to their home in the spring.

The whole family is thrilled. Ron is wonderful with Dad, and is in his way a remarkably kind and effective caregiver. Personally, I not only am thankful that Ron and Karen will be there to care for Mom and Dad but also that his presence here will allow us to spend more time together. Seems as thought we've gotten closer than ever, and it is a joy to be around him.

These events overshadow anything that took place during my personal workouts and diet last week. I finished the week feeling sore and injured but surprisingly Monday morning felt strong and healed. At weigh in I was told I had released 10 pounds during my first two weeks. That's probably a bit overstated since the first weigh in was in the evening with clothes and the second in shorts and t-shirt after a morning workout. Still, I probably shed a good 7 pounds, which is a nice start.

Week 1

My strongest impression from the first week is that having a coach or trainer makes a huge difference. I haven’t had a coach since high school, which means that in virtually everything I have done I have set my own pace and determined my own limits. At times, whether in practicing law or in training for running events, I have worked with and to some degree been paced or motivated by others. But even in those instances I largely determined the degree of effort and, particularly with my running, determined the type and frequency of my workouts.

The 90-Day program departs from this pattern in several important respects. First, our trainers have a set program that focuses on resistance and cardio training on alternate days. In addition, cardio and resistance exercises vary from session to session so that workouts rotate between muscle sets to increase stress on the body and minimize its ability to adapt, thus breaking down and consequently increasing muscle development over more routine programs. This variety departs significantly from my previous training programs.

Second, the goal of the workouts is to push us to what the trainers call Level 10, which is where muscles their limits. There is scarcely a day goes by where I would not have quit at least four or five times if the trainers weren’t pushing us to do more, reminding us constantly of the benefits of exertion.

Third, as part of a group, I find myself both motivated and inspired by the efforts of others. There are two men and eleven women in our group. The other man, Ryan, is young and quite fit. The fitness and athleticism of the women varies considerably. A few have participated in marathons, Ragnars and other running events. Some of the best athletes among the women appear to have become overweight as they age. A couple, including the oldest woman in the group, would probably be classified as obese. Regardless of the women’s fitnesses levels, they all show up before 5:30 AM, are cheerful and supportive, and seem to push to their capacities. When I feel as though I want to stop, especially when doing ab exercises, I see women pushing through the pain and I keep going.

I have a shelf full of books and magazines about diet and exercise. The information I have accumulated is largely repetitive but that the same time overwhelming. The benefits of cross training and rotating exercise between muscle groups are well documented. Similarly, virtue of eating what Michael Pollen calls real “food” in frequent small meals is promoted widely in nutrition literature. Yet to put all this to practice requires significant motivation, planning and study. For me, all of this has over the years proven overwhelming, as evidenced by the slow creep upward of my weight and the steady deterioration of my skeleton, part the result of my tibial plateau fracture and part the result of heredity, advancing age, loss of fitness and weight gain.

This program has provided motivation and eliminated the need for me to plan and sort out all the data. I no longer have to think. I just have to do it.

On about my second or third day Dan showed up at 5:30 AM and told me he wanted to work out with me. I was excited to see him, as were the trainers, who grew to love him when he went through the program. Dan’s impressive results triggered my interest in following him. He encouraged me to do it, and even explained to Tauni why the financial investment made sense. At the end of the workout I told Dan that this was one of the best things I had ever done. The pain and effort must release a flood of endorphins because I end each workout feeling joyous and stress free. Even on the day I had to appear to argue a very difficult motion, I proceeded with unusual equanimity.

Dan had told me before I started that each workout session involved intense pain, and that has mostly proven to be true. Some days are easier than others, but there are times during every workout where I hurt and reach my limit. The paradox of pain is that it is necessary to protect us from injury while at the same time significant fitness cannot be attained without it. The mind must distinguish between the pain that signals injury and the pain that signals growth. We must avoid foolish or needless suffering but suffer we must if we are to approach our potential. My late law partner, Bob “Mad Dog” Henderson, veteran of several Wasatch Front 100 Mile Endurance runs, used to extol the virtues of pain. I recall him saying: “You work with pain; pain works with you.” Translated, I think Bob meant that we must condition our minds to endure the good pain associated with effective training and in return pain works with us to improve our bodies. No doubt emotional pain is also necessary to improve our souls, though it can also destroy us. Even in that realm, there is good and bad pain, and we must learn to work with it so it can work with us and perfect us.

Saturday was our final workout of week 1. Our schedule showed “community free workout” so I assumed we would simply show up and spend a relatively leisurely hour exercising on our own. Instead, we worked our way through various stations doing a variety of high intensity cardio exercises, including jump roping, which I once could do but now cannot, at least not well. I rode my bike to the gym (8 miles) and planned to ride home. On this day, however, there was an interval of 1 1/2 between our community workout and a Marci Lock presentation on our relationship to food. I decided to spend that time trying to run, which I haven't done much for a number of years.

To minimize impact on my bad knee, at least in theory, I ran on the grass at a park neighboring the gym. Inspired by Marci to engage in high intensity exercise, and recalling that my favorite interval in high school was 330 yards, I paced off a distance of about 300 yards and ran several intervals at 6 minute mile pace. This is the fastest I have run in years. I felt good, if not coordinated yet, until a few hours later when my knees started to ache, not just my bad right knee but my left as well. To top it off the rotator cuff of my right shoulder had become extremely sore and my lower back began to seize up upon bending over.

All of this reminds me both of the distinction between good and bad pain, but at the moment more importantly that doing too much can result in injury that will undo the benefit of a lot of exercise. For my shoulder, I visited Nylin Johnson, a good friend and physical therapist housed in the same building as the gym. He had one of his therapists provide massage and electrical stimulation and then taped my shoulders to pull my out of my naturally hunched position. One of the members of our group, Melodi Christensen, whose chiropractor husband treated me before I started the program, noticed my back seizing up and immediately called her husband following our workout on Monday or Tuesday of week 2. His office called and had me come right over. After an adjustment my back was somewhat improved, but it is still ginger. With the aid of a back brace and avoidances of weighted squats and dead lifts the back is rapidly improving.

And so I concluded week 1 feeling energized but chastened with the recognition that I need to take care to make sure that all the work results in my body being built up rather than torn down.

Day 2

I have learned that the official name for the my new diet and fitness program is the Marci Lock 90 Day Mind-Body Transformation. Before I started, Dan told me that the first couple weeks were easy. After that, each workout would be an hour of pain.

If our trainers have gone easy on us so far, I can hardly wait to see what comes next. In two days I have experienced a level of pain that recently has been matched only in my chiropractors's office. This morning alone I reached a level of pain where, if Erin and Kristin had not been pushing me, I would have quit at least four times. Of course, the potential humiliation of quitting in front of a roomful of women working out near me was also strong motivation to keep going.

But the results so far have been outstanding. My bum knee already feels better than it has since I broke it seven years ago. I told Kristin this morning that my goal is to run the Ragnar Tennessee on November 6. Yesterday I thought there was a 50% chance I could do it. Today, barring something unforeseen, I am convinced I can do it. If nothing else, the mind part of the program is working. As my brother Ron might say, the brainwashing so far has been very effective.

Today I reached another milestone of sorts. I completed muscle activation therapy with Dr. Josh Christensen. Each time he tests a muscle and it collapses at the push of his little finger I think there must be some trick. Then he works me over for a few minutes, often causing the aforementioned extreme pain. After that, my previously flimsy muscle resists his very firm push. I am convinced the work he has done in reactivating the muscles in my legs (6 muscles/ leg) has caused me to lose my limp and made it possible to feel as good as I do today following the cardio workout.

Regarding my current level of fitness, the biggest surprises so far have been how weak my shoulders and abs are. While doing planks, Erin commented she could hold a plank all day. I collapsed after about 5 seconds. I didn't come close to holding for the 20 seconds she told us to do.

Today we received our food logs and were instructed to record everything we eat, including precise quantities and calorie counts for three weeks. That and swear off sugar and diet drinks. My daily calorie quota is 1870, which till this week has been, for me, a typical lunch.

Sadly, my dad fell yesterday and broke his hip. I called brother Ron after leaving Dr. Christensen's office. Dad is quite disoriented, announces his name and date of birth to everyone who enters his room. This morning he ordered my sister to call me and my brothers and have us come to the hospital and bring him home. At times he thinks he is home.

We'll never know this for sure, but Dad's determination to care for himself and be independent has probably contributed to his loss of independence. Had he been willing to use a wheelchair outside the home, maybe he wouldn't have fallen and broken his arm two weeks ago. If that hadn't happened, maybe he wouldn't have fallen yesterday. I think that among the hardest things in life are to understand that we sometimes need help, to recognize when we need it, and to accept needed help when offered. Reminds me of the sermon of the Reverend Maclean in "River Runs Through It." As that good Reverend said, even if those we know and love won't accept our help, we can still love completely without complete understanding. So it is with Dad. Even though he has refused help I think would have made a difference, we know we have no course but to love completely and to help all we can to ease the burdens of his old age.

Last, I talked to Dan following the workout. Told him Marci has now, for me, become the magical Wizard, the woman behind the curtain. Putting it in different terms, Dan remarked that she has made herself the brand -- which of course is the goal of every smart lawyer.

And with that observation, back to preparation for my summary judgment hearing tomorrow morning.

Everlasting fitness

It has been three years since my series of posts about the Ragnar Great River. Then we were a very small company - five employees - and the founders were in control. Today there are over 25 employees, I have exited, and Dolphin Capital is in control. Then we had four events and maybe 3000+ participants. Today there are 12 events and over 30,000 participants.

When I started this blog, my plan was to log my impressions, event by event. That obviously did not happen, in part because the company grew so fast it soon became impractical for me, or anyone. to attend all events.

As I mentioned, I exited a year ago when Dolphin assumed total control. For over a year I attended no events - other than Las Vegas, where a runner, Jeremy Kunz, was tragically killed by a drunk driver - for over a year. I returned to observe the 2010 Ragnar Wasatch Back, which has grown from its humble beginning with 22 teams in 2004 to 1050 teams in 2010. It was bittersweet. On the one hand, the growth of the event and the impact it has in Utah is both remarkable and inspiring. On the other, I have many mixed emotions about my own departure and lack of involvement.

That said, the 2010 event motivated me to try to get fit enough to run a Ragnar. Since I broke the tibial plateau of my left knee in 2003, on doctors' advice I have refrained from running. The reasoning is that running will accelerate deterioration of the joint and force an earlier knee replacement. Now I think that, worse case, the knee replacement puts me where I have been the last seven years. Best case, the doctors are full of crap and with training the knee will be better off.

So, following the lead of Dan and Tanner, I have enrolled in a Fit4Life, or Everlasting Fitness (pick your handle), program, developed by Marci Lock. It involves 90 days of intense strength and cardio training, together with diet and mind coaching. The object is to come away both fit and with good habits that will enable me to maintain fitness and healthy eating habits for a lifetime, what little I have left.

My motivations are threefold (at least): (1) to lose the 25 or so pounds of ugly fat I gained during the final stressful stages of the Microsoft case during the late 90s (when I also went through male menopause), (2) to get fit enough to run a Ragnar, and (3) to develop the discipline that will make me more productive in all areas of my life. Re the latter, in of the attractions of this program is that it goes 5 days a week, beginning at 5:30AM. This means I will get started early, and, I hope, be more productive in the office and actually have evenings available for something other than legal work. We shall see.

As part of the process, it is my intention to blog the experience.

Last night was orientation. There are 9 other participants in the program - all women. Erin is our trainer and Kristin our coach. I have no idea yet how their roles differentiate. Both are fit, enthusiastic and beautiful. They told us of the experiences with and belief in the program, and invited testimonials both from previous participants and one participant spouse. They then asked the 10 of us to introduce ourselves and describe our own objectives. Several women were quite emotional and expressed a desire to "take control" of their lives. Others seemed to perhaps have more concrete objectives. No one simply said they want to get rid of ugly fat, and indeed I think we are all seeking something more life-changing than that.

Following our meeting we all were weighed, measured and photographed. I had promised myself I would avoid the classic before and after photos that appear in airline magazines. Despite that, I found myself following instructions to remove my shirt and strike ridiculous pose. Fortunately no one asked me to look at my photo. I do hope that, when done, I will want to see the after photo.

Once released I saw my son Dan, who had come to the gym for his personal workout. He gave me a few pointers on supplements, and assured me that the intense workouts would be both painful and beneficial. He observed that he has seen me do the equivalent of long, slow distance but never anything very intense. That's fair. I have done interval training, but that was a long time ago, back in 1993 before my last marathon.

All in all, I am excited to get going. Can't wait to see what happens